Being nearly 7 months pregnant with my first child, I’ve found a million and one things to stress about during this journey. Is the baby gaining enough weight? Will my next ultrasound be OK? What the hell is labor going to be like? However, one prevailing concern as I head towards the gestational finish line surrounds the possibility of facing postpartum depression – and I am scared.
Jill Scott spoke about her postpartum struggles during a 2010 interview on Chelsea Lately:
I am going to keep it real gully with you. The first two months, I wanted to give him back. I expected somebody to come and save me because after you have the baby, nobody cares about you anymore.
Nobody cares if you sleep; nobody cares if you eat. It’s just you and this all consuming thingy. And he wants all your time and attention and it hurt the first two months. One day as I was standing by the door and I was considering throwing him out into the pool (sleep deprivation is ugly), at that moment I looked at him and said, ‘ah, I love you. I love you.’
- Via BlackCelebKids.com
As its name suggests, postpartum depression (PPD) is a mood disorder that becomes apparent after childbirth. Whether it’s your 1st or 5th child, pregnancy and childbirth brings with it a dizzying array of lifestyle changes, hormonal changes, and emotional changes that could leave one susceptible to developing some level of mood change or disorder.
When investigating these mood changes in women who have recently delivered a child, the medical community differentiates between the less severe ‘baby blues’ (a short period of sadness, anxiety, and trouble sleeping that alleviates within a couple of weeks) and the more intense and long-lasting PPD. A woman dealing with an extreme loss of appetite, oversleeping or insomnia, withdrawal from friends and family, intense anxiety or anger, and difficulty bonding with her baby (or thoughts of harming herself or her baby) may be dealing with PPD – and understandably so. Our bodies, minds, and lives on a whole undergo an incredible shift during and after pregnancy, including hormonal drops, sleep deprivation, embracing new identities, and relationship or financial stress, to name a few.
These factors can all lead to a diagnosis of PPD, and should not be ignored.
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Shame and guilt play dual roles in PPD as well. Among the prevailing symptoms of the condition, shame and guilt can set in when something as “innate” as motherhood doesn’t come as naturally as one would hope. Breastfeeding struggles, a perceived inability to console a crying child, or insecurities over ones’ ability to effectively care for and raise a child all add to the weight that a woman at risk for PPD carries.
Shame and guilt also have a hand in hampering women who feel they may need help. In communities where mental illness is stigmatized and minimized, some women may feel unable to reach out and say “I don’t think I’m OK.” In communities where women are praised for their strength and ability to overcome nearly anything, some women may feel that they’ll be exposing their weaknesses by seeking assistance. Some studies show that racial disparities exist in the diagnosis and treatment of PPD, which adds another crucial factor to the management of the condition. One African-American mother recently wrote about the complexities of being a Black woman with PPD, and for her, the themes of strength and stigma played out vividly. Societal and cultural contexts have such an impact on the pursuit of wellness, and if we aren’t careful, those contexts can impede that journey.
So, where do my personal fears of PPD come from? Well, one of the top risk factors for PPD is a previous history of depression, which I have. Anxiety sets in when I wonder if the child I adore already will lead my body and mind to another battle when I feel like I’ve just returned from the frontlines. Voicing my concerns are met with certain friends and family members who tell me to “hush” and ask me why I choose to “dwell on negativity,” when I see it as being realistic. I already smell the sweet stench of support intertwined with stigma, and that adds to my concerns.
However, let me not get ahead of myself. Should PPD become a reality for me as it is for 9-16% of postpartum women, there are options for help:
- 1-to-1 counseling
- support groups
- antidepressant medication (with options that are safe for breastfeeding moms)
- accessing supportive and helpful friends and family members
- regular exercise
- eating well
- getting a healthy amount of sleep
With the acknowledgment that something isn’t right, a supportive circle, and appropriate medical attention, PPD can be treated, managed, and overcome.
Are you seeking resources to learn more about PPD? Here are a few to check out:
American Psychological Association
Postpartum Progress’ List of Canadian and U.S. PPD Support Groups
New moms out there, I wish for you what I wish for myself: health, happiness, and the ability to recognize when something just isn’t right. I wish you the blessing of having even just one supportive loved one and/or the ability to access helpful resources. PPD is not something to be ashamed of, nor is it something one must weather on their own.
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