My wife, Cynthia Bailey, and I have spent four seasons on the wildly popular and successful Real Housewives of Atlanta reality television show where millions of viewers have witnessed the good, the bad and the some times downright craziness that occurs in our day-to-day lives and that of our fellow cast members. And while fans of Bravo’s top rated show really only get to see a very small snippet of what goes on in our marriage and relationships with the other cast members, for the most part it represents the reality of our lives.
On the show, I stay very true to who I am as a man, a husband, an entrepreneur and a friend. Though some fans think I meddle in “women’s business”, I am a part of this show just like Gregg Leakes, Apollo Nida, Todd Tucker and for one season so was Kordell Stewart. Without our support and encouragement, our wives’ reality could not be portrayed. So their business on RHOA tends to be our business as well. Just thought I’d clear that up.
I am naturally outspoken and I speak my mind even sometimes to the chagrin of my wife. Some viewers, and even some cast members, take offense to that part of me, but it’s who I am. Love me or hate me, I will not bite my tongue, especially when it comes to ensuring my point of view or opinion is made. How that encourages someone who is equally outspoken and opinionated to suggest I am “acting like a bitch” has me completely confused and highly offended.
Many people have sent me messages through my social media channels asking me how I feel about the unfortunate confrontation between Nene, Gregg and myself. In fact, in all of my time on the show, I have never received so many inquiries about a single incident. So, I decided to address it once and for all.
In March, our viewers and fans witnessed Nene Leakes, someone I’ve supported, cheered for and considered a friend for a few years now, completely disrespect me on national television by recklessly saying I was “acting like a bitch.” Why? Simply because I thought my friend could have handled herself more professionally and with much more class at a specific charity event. Well guess what? I still think my friend was out of line in the way she acted. It was probably the most uncomfortable situation I’ve found myself in on the show thus far. Even my friend’s Pillow Talk party fiasco wasn’t as bad to me as the charity event (or when my sister- and mother-in-law hid Cynthia’s and my marriage license, but I digress) because I have always respected Nene for her hustle and her ability to overcome any obstacle. As her friends, Cynthia and I have witnessed Nene become a household name and supported her on her path to mainstream success. We were #TeamLeakes through Nene’s unfortunate divorce and her subsequent re-marriage to the love of her life. She’s even been there to support Cynthia and I through our ups and downs.
So imagine my surprise, my anger and my disappointment when my friend verbally attacked me in Mexico while Gregg and I were discussing what happened at the charity event. First of all, I never confronted Nene. I was talking to Cynthia and explaining to my wife that Nene’s behavior that night made me (and many others in attendance) uncomfortable and why I wanted to leave, when Nene approached me. She got in my face, not the other way around. So Gregg was completely wrong in his assessment of what actually happened. As a friend, I felt it necessary to explain to her my position and why I think she was wrong. Was she upset because I violated the “Nene Leakes Friends Agreement” and went rogue by questioning her actions and calling her out on her antics? Challenging Mrs. Leakes is apparently something you don’t do. I guess it’s obvious that I didn’t get that memo.
Her insults continued in her Housewives’ confessionals and spurred the creation of several memes and caricatures of me in drag, and in the cast lineup alongside the ladies holding my own peach (the signature logo for the Atlanta housewives franchise). Most were hilarious, and pretty damn creative I might add. Yet, these images were born from my friend’s harsh insult and attempt at emasculating me.
Nene’s used to being loud, wild and obnoxious. That’s what’s made her famous I assume. But it’s also what’s making her unlikeable to so many. She’s gone from dancing on the pole in hood strip clubs to Dancing With The Stars on television screens worldwide, and that’s simply phenomenal. I am proud of the trajectory she is on. However, I am very disappointed in my friend’s inability to accept responsibility for her actions. And let me be clear, Nene won’t be great until she can admit when she is wrong.
Friends should be able to provide constructive criticism of one another, especially when it is coming from a very good place. Attacking each other only leads to hard feelings and hard falls.
As told to Nikita Frenney
Photo credits: Paras Griffin, StraightFromtheA, Bravo