Courtesy of The Frisky
Okay, so sometimes we fib a little bit when we’re dating a guy. Not about the big stuff — like our name or what we do for a living. It’s not that we mean to be dishonest, it’s just that our politeness, insecurity or desire to dazzle get in the way of the truth. And sometimes, before we know it, we’ve told you we read all of David Foster Wallace’s books, when really we’ve only read all of DFW’s book jackets. We meant to read the books in their entirety, we just haven’t gotten around to it yet. Anyhow, what we’re trying to say is that we’re sorry for all the stupid lies we’ve told.
1. I’m totally over my ex. I’m still Facebook stalking him and fantasizing about him sexually on a regular basis, but other than that, he’s old news.
2. I haven’t had sex with anyone in a while. Last week is a while, right?
3. I’m not on anxiety meds. As long as you don’t look in my medicine cabinet, I’m not.
4. I really like bluegrass music. Yeah, I really like to laugh at people who listen to it.
5. I’m not looking for a relationship. My ass, I’m not. I just didn’t want to overwhelm you on our fourth date.