By Demetria L. Lucas
Some version of this question comes up almost daily on my Formspring feed where I mainly answer questions about dating/ relationships (16,000 questions answered and counting). There’s often a woman who agreed to do something — go on vacation, tag along to a party, play wing woman on date — and now doesn’t want to, or can’t because of a schedule conflict or a financial setback. They want to know how to get out of it without hurting the friend’s feelings, or perhaps worse, incurring their wrath, so they suggest lying instead.
The lie, of course, is a short-term convenience, a tool some women are using to avoid acknowledging bad communication in their friendships. Those women also aren’t thinking of long-term consequences of avoiding the truth. (And I only say women because most of the women seeking advice on friendships are women. As such, I can’t speak for the guys on this one.)